Ever wondered what mysterious force drives us into the arms of one person, while pushing us away from another?

“It is a painful thing to look at your own trouble and know that you yourself and no one else has made it.”
Sophocles

Review of Blue Label Life's Singles Event - 19 July 2011.

As I skipped through the rain dodging puddles in my leaking ballet flats, I wondered what the night would bring. I’d coaxed one of my only single friends into being my ‘wing-wo-man’ to a Blue Label Life singles bash at Sydney's ECQ Bar. We met underneath Circular Quay station where we swapped flats for heels and huddled under our only umbrella – Sydney hadn’t seen this kind of weather for over sixty years!

I wouldn’t call myself a shy person. I mean, I’ve never struggled to keep conversation with people I meet, but I’ve recently encountered a problem. For whatever reason, every time I see a girl, it’s like my brain and feet freeze. I simply can’t go up to talk to them. Any tips on breaking the ice?
Simon, via email

There’s a new cat in town, according to American entrepreneur and author Donna Estes Antebi.  

In her new book, The Real Secrets Women Only Whisper, Antebi has dubbed the term ‘Cleo’ as the next phase in the highly publicised ‘Cougar’ phenomenon.

Inspired by Cleopatra, former ruler of Egypt, Cleos are smart, powerful women who are sought after by men from all demographics for not only their looks, but also their ability to proverbially ‘bring home the bacon’.

“It looks as though the cougar craze has evolved to the next level,” says Samantha Jayne, director of Australian matchmaking company, Blue Label Life.

I’ve been dating my partner on and off for seven years. He says he loves me, and has always thought that one day we would get hitched. When I’m with him, he is the perfect man. Funny, witty, makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside, but he doesn’t seem to want to take the next step. I really love him and would love to get married and start a family. What should I do?
Susan, via email

What are the factors you need to look at when you are deciding whether or not to stay friends with an ex? Does it matter which party broke it off? What is the etiquette if you and your ex are in the same social circle? What is the etiquette if you and your ex are in the same social circle? How should you conduct yourself around an ex if you are in the same workplace? What happens if you find yourself in a cycle of seeing each other, sleeping together, trying to make it work then breaking up again? Should you just make a clean break? Would being friends with an ex hamper your motivation to find a new relationship? Answers within!

One of my favourite anecdotes is about the woman who wanted to find the perfect man. She came across a tall building that said; “Men Inside”.

She thought this would be a good place to start her search.

When she went inside, there was a man standing by the elevator. She asked about the sign; "Men Inside".

The man responded that, yes, this building was full of men. He told her that there were five more stories (levels) in the building, and that each story had men on it.

He told her that she could select any man in the building, or no man at all, whatever she liked. He also told her that she could start on lowest floor, look around, meet the men, and decide if she wanted to select one of them.

When looking for a partner, the best place to look is at yourself. No, I don’t mean stand in front of a mirror and hope the best, but think about who you are. Think about your likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. Now think about the person you want to be. If these two people don’t match up, do something about it! 

No matter how long you’ve been single, I truly believe anyone can find the partner of their dreams in 28 days or less.

I know what you’re thinking; "Woah woah, hold up a second. I’ve been single for months - even years - how do know the magic password to the kingdom of love?"

Ever heard the expression; “in order to love, you must first love yourself?” I have, and let me tell you, it’s true. Self actualisation is numero uno in the steps to success. If you don’t value your own company, how do you expect anyone else to?

Sarah Jessica Parker had one. Have you?

Mr Big is painted as a knight in shining armour. A successful, emotionally unavailable man that fills SJP’s life with hope and adventure, only to leave her shattered on all kinds of levels.

He’s an unhealthy addiction.  The minute she showed interest, he would run for the hills. And when she pulled away, he would chase her down.

Sound familiar?

What are the best places to meet men that want more than just a hook-up?
Miranda, via eail

When your heart gets shattered after a breakup or divorce, how do you put the pieces back together again? Many heartbroken individuals fear opening themselves up to another relationship because they don't want to get hurt again.

The good news is with time, many do find that the heartbreak passes and they are able to love once again. Here we will discuss how to love again after heartbreak:

Many single men and women write to me expressing confusion, uncertainty and frustration regarding the whole dating scene. Their stories are often filled with tales of broken dates, unanswered emails and/or phone calls and guys just disappearing for no apparent reason. They are looking for answers about what qualities the opposite sex look for when choosing a partner to date, and what single professionals really want from their relationships.  and want to know what single Most of all, they want to know how to find and build mutually satisfying and lasting relationships.

It's been said that in order to know where you're going, you must first acknowledge where you have been. Below are five turn offs that have single handedly led to the demise of relationships all around the world. Avoid these and happiness awaits!

To kiss, or not to kiss. That is the question! Quite a big question really, and one which is often over analysed by single men and women out there on the dating scene. If you ask me, I think kissing on the first date is a very personal thing. Some like to do it, others like the anticipation waiting a few dates.

The idea of playing tonsil hockey with a complete stranger is not my idea of a great night out. I love mystery and anticipation. There is nothing like getting to know a person first and keep them guessing. “The old does he/she like me?” raises anticipation levels to their peak, which ultimately pays off once the question is finally answered.

As the saying goes, money can’t buy love. While this statement holds true for some, for others, it's not the case.  

Recently, we conducted a poll that found 25% of people would choose money over love. The same figures have changed significantly since our last survey back in November 2009 where only 5% of people chose money over love.

Seems that times have changed in only 12 months. Has the recovery of the recession had an impact on our natural selection of finding the one? Maybe those green notes do keep us warm at night and give us that warm fuzzy feeling when we, well... buy our new shoes, live in that gorgeous house and travel around the world.

Call me old fashioned, but I’m still a big believe in L. O. V. E Love! Maybe that is the romantic side of me coming out, but there is nothing better than being captured in bubble of love! Don’t know about, you but it puts a huge smile on my face and pep in my step!

When it comes to finding the love of your life, what's more important to you; love or money?

Smiling is a winner when it comes to first impressions and there’s nothing like a warm and confident smile to create a great one. With the advances in dentistry and technology, straight teeth and an attractive smile are more attainable than ever.

Some of you may have seen the footage on Today tonight about Snap-On Smile, which is new dentistry that can give you a Hollywood Smile.

Snap-On Smile was invented by a dentist who realised that not everyone can afford many thousands of dollars to get a Hollywood smile make-over.

Most of us enter into a “Relationship” expecting it will make us happier, more fulfilled, safe and secure than being single.  We often believe that our life will become more enriched and exciting when we are involved with someone. 

Yet many of us discover that after the infatuation has past our “Relationship” makes us less happy or even miserable.  Why does something that starts so good often end up being flat, bad or even nasty?  In this series of articles Jim O’Connor explains the reasons why this happens and what to do about it.

The French have a saying, “Le coeur a ses raisons que la raison ne connaît pas.” – The heart has reasons that reason does not recognise. When it comes to love, the heart often does not recognise race, culture, skin colour, religion or language. But that’s not to say it can’t get in the way.

It’s easy for Beyoncé to say. Here’s a woman who’s perhaps the most sought-after artist on the planet. A woman who’s currently dating perhaps the most powerful hip-hop mogul and all-round superstar in Jay-Z.  And a woman who has, at one stage, played a starring role in the wet dreams of every man on planet. Why not tell other suckers (whoops I mean, “single ladies”) to put our hands up?

Then again, Beyoncé, like every other American woman, isn’t faced with the same dilemma as single birds from the land down under.  

The dilemma I’m referring to is the highly publicised, buzz-phrase, The Man Drought. 

I wouldn’t call myself a shy person. I mean, I’ve never struggled to keep conversation with people I meet, but I’ve recently encountered a problem. For whatever reason, every time I see a girl, not only does my brain go into meltdown, but my feet are frozen in motion. I can’t go up to talk to them. Any tips on breaking the ice?
Lachlan, via email

I’m thinking of asking my girlfriend the big question; “will you move in with me?” Problem is, I fear my apartment will undergo a dramatic gender transformation as a result. What should I be prepared for is she says yes?
Colin, via email

I’m interested in my friend’s ex-girlfriend. They have been broken up for a while and we have been flirting for years. Would I be crossing a line if I told her how I feel?
Damien, via email

I’m only 28 and I’m going bald. I hear most women love a man with a good head of hair. What should I do? I am considering plugs. As shallow as it sounds, I feel like my life with women is over if I don’t!
Barry, via email

First dates can be nerve wrecking. I can’t tell you how many awkward/inappropriate lines have flown out my mouth – those lines that leave you red-faced and wanting to find the nearest bathroom window to climb out of.

As much as I’d like to encourage my clients to give people three chances to impress, others are not so forgiving. If you’re consistently getting bad feedback from first dates, chances are you’re making one of the five common first date mistakes.